“Am I pretty?”
With my brows furrowed, I sit here wondering what kind of daughters are being raised. I’ve very sadly seen girls who believe that they must act and behave in a certain way, quite simply because, they are, in the limited spectrum of people’s imagination, nothing but lesser mortals that need to be objectified.
“Am I pretty?” becomes *the* only question they ever want to ask because that is probably *the* only question others have ever entertained (be it peers, friends, parents, extended family or sadly even, strangers), because they are raised to believe that end of the day, they are just an object of “prettiness” and nothing more. Objectification is easy isn’t it!
And so, they are raised as weaklings. You waste your time teaching them from a young age that having a perfect shade of skin tone or shiny/glossy hair will make you “immortal” in people’s eyes, it’s is *all* that matters. Approval of others becomes mandatory even if you’re raised as a dumb kid, having no clue about history, politics or even how to travel across the town or let’s say, cross the road?
So there in, to find out if their “ultimate” purpose has been fulfilled, I see girls dissolve into nothingness. They are taught that the success of their lives depends on all the materialistic external matters: the petty things that would last just for a moment in this space of eternity.
How often have you heard a girl child ask someone “You think I’m smart enough, intelligent enough, fulfilling the purpose for what I was created, is my character something I would be proud of, a face that would handle both adversity and exhilaration with grace and elegance, without letting one overtake the other , would I enjoy the roller coaster ride life throws or will I dramatise and look for pity and sympathy? ” Have you heard of any girl child asking you any of these questions? Nope? Me neither!
When I have a daughter one fine day, and if she were to ever come up to me and ask if she was pretty enough, I would say:
“That’s like belittling the very purpose for which you were created. You think the Lord, the Mighty and Wise sent you here so you could achieve instant gratification? Because of the way look?
Nay! You were sent here to push yourself beyond the invisible boundaries created in your own mind. Ask yourself if you are smart enough, if you are pretty confident, pretty intelligent or pretty brilliant. Are you successful in fulfilling His commandments and sticking on to the Path that He (swt) has laid so clearly? Are you being dutiful to all that He (swt) said, would you be proud enough the meet the Prophet (saws) and tell him, “You know what, for all that life threw at me, I stuck to your sunnah, to the path that would please our Rabb.” Have you accomplished anything using your talent(s) to achieve success?
Realise that superficial beauty is not all that there is to life and beyond. You *are* beautiful because Allah, Al Musavvir created you and He has created you in the best manner possible! Do not go about raising doubts about His creation. Be content. Be happy and be pretty by tuning yourself in for a higher purpose, in your own way! Not the way others want you to, not the way the general masses do, because, you know what, you are a creation whom He (swt) thought was more than just “pretty.” Your Lord (swt) made you unique. Don’t belittle yourself by summarising your creation in one word. Okay? And don’t let anyone else tell you otherwise!”
I can go on and on, but I guess I’ll wrap it up here.